Here is some of stages that successful self-changers go through:
Pre-contemplation -You’re not aware of the need for change. You’re obvious to your problem. Perhaps in denial.
Contemplation - The light bulb goes on and you realize that something’s wrong and you need, or want, to change. You start thinking about changing yourself. Perhaps you discuss it with others.
Preparation - You start to talk openly about the change you want to make. You do some research and think about various options and approaches to bringing about the desired change in yourself. You make a decision or commitment to change.
Action - You get your rear in gear and start doing something to bring about the change you seek.
Maintenance - You’ve made the change in yourself and now your task is to keep it up over the long haul.
Termination - The new behavior is so firmly established that you don’t need to think or do much about it anymore. (At this point you may start the process all over again with another aspect of yourself you’d like to change.)